Funny Hangover Quotes and Sayings
“Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.” Frank Sinatra
“A hangover is the wrath of grapes.”¬†- Anon
“Somebody slipped a hangover in my drink last night.”¬†- Anon
“A hangover is when you open your eyes in the morning and wish you hadn’t.”¬†- Anon
W. C. Fields
Now don’t say you can’t swear off drinking; it’s easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.
How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil’s Brew. I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon–and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.
Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got.
Thou shalt not kill anything less than a fifth.
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s house unless they have a well-stocked bar.
Somebody’s been putting pineapple juice in my pineapple juice!
Say, Mr. Fields, I read in the paper where you consumed two quarts of liquor a day. What would your father think about that?¬†
WC: He’d think I was a sissy.
I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.
I don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.
Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water.
Of course, now I touch nothing stronger than buttermilk: 90-proof buttermilk.
Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch…
I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve.
I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m.
“Grease is the only cure for a hangover.”¬†- Cameron Diaz
“One of the curious effects of a bad hangover is that you think you’re wrong whether you are or not. Not wrong in particulars, but wrong in general, wrong about everything.”¬†- Jim Harrison
“I feel like I have a hangover, without all the happy memories and mystery bruises.”¬†- Ellen DeGeneres
“I love drugs, but I hate hangovers, and the hatred of the hangover wins by a landslide every time.”¬†- Margaret Cho
“Credit buying is much like being drunk. The buzz happens immediately and gives you a lift… The hangover comes the day after.”¬†- Joyce Brothers
“You come home, and you party. But after that, you get a hangover. Everything about that is negative.”¬†- Mike Tyson
“Just for this one night I will not think about you. I will have fun, and laugh again. And enjoy every minute. Tomorrow I will deal with the hangover.”¬†- Anon
“I want to make out with the fat guy from ‘The Hangover’. He’s amazing. I like big, fat guys with beards that wear thick glasses.”¬†- Kesha
“Shower didn’t work. Coffee didn’t work. Cold air is not working. Snooze on the bus my only chance to get rid of my hangover.”¬†- Twitter Tweet
“I have finally come to the conclusion that it’s not the drink that causes hangovers. It’s the sleep”¬†- Anon