Red Cars and Bird Droppings

Look! Up in the air! It’s a bird! It’s a plane! (Plop!) No, it’s definitely a bird.

According to research from British automotive supplier Halfords, red cars attract more bird droppings than any others. .

Its researchers checked out 1,140 cars in Brighton, Glasgow, Leeds, Manchester and Bristol over two consecutive days, and found that green cars came off best, followed by silver. White vehicles fared better than black.

Eighteen percent of red cars were marked with droppings, compared with 14 percent for blue, 11 for black, seven percent for white, three percent for grey or silver and just one percent for green.

 They don’t know why?

Moral of the story:

Buy a green car!

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Shit – A Bird Story

A little bird was flying south for the winter.  It was so cold; the bird froze up and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it.  As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.  The dung was actually thawing him out!  He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!

The morals of this story are:

• Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.

• Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

• And when you’re in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!