An Irishman found a Genie lamp and rubbed it. Out came the Genie who says, “Master you have released me from the lamp and I grant you three wishes, what would you like?”
The Irishman scratches his head, then answers, “A bottle of Guinness that never gets empty.”
“Granted, master!”, retorted the Genie and produced the bottle.
The man was delighted and got drunk on this one magic Guiness bottle for weeks then he remembered that he had two other wishes. He rubbed the lamp again and the Genie appeared.
“Yes master, you have two more wishes, what would you like?”
“You know that magic, never ending Guinness bottle?” he asked the Genie. “Well, for my final two wishes, I’d like another two of them.”
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Late on one Saturday night, the Garda spotted O’Callaghan driving very erratically through the streets of Dungarvan, County Waterford. The policeman pulled him over and asked O’Callaghan if he had been drinking that evening.
‘Aye, so I have. ‘Tis Saturday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints,’ chattered the inebriated O’Callaghan. ‘Then there was something called “Happy Hour” and they served these mar-gar-itos which are quite good. I had four or five o’ those. Then I had to drive me friend O’Reilly home and o’ course I had to go in for a couple of Guinness – couldn’t be rude, ye know. Then I stopped on the way home to get another bottle for later …,’ and O’Callaghan fumbled around in his coat until he located his bottle of whiskey, which he held up for inspection.
The Garda officer sighed and said, ‘Sir, I’m afraid I’ll need you to step out of the car and take a breathalyser test.’
Indignantly, O’Callaghan replied, ‘Why? Don’t ye believe me?’
***
A Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walk into a pub. They each buy a pint of Guiness beer.
Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head.The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.
The Scotsman fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened.
The Irishman too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer and then started yelling, “SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT, YOU Damn Fly!!”
Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head.The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust.
The Scotsman fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened.
The Irishman too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer and then started yelling, “SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT, YOU Damn Fly!!”
Continue reading about A Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walk into a pub.
The following poster was found in a Montana history book.
If you were around in 1919 and came upon the following poster…
I mean, seriously, would you quit drinking?
More posters about prohibition.
funny emails
It’s a new fad in our “Home”!
The young kids can’t have all the fun.
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I wish someone would ice me…
I could use a free drink!
funny email, getting iced, I got iced, ice me, icing
I “got iced” the other day and was informed that Icing was a growing phenomenon. I had never heard of it before. Apparently it is very popular with the College Crowd.
I really was fascinated by Wikipedia’s description of the skills required:
consuming alcoholic beverages.
I wonder how you develop that skill???
I certainly plan to Ice someone in the near future. Hope they have the required skills!
| Players | 2+ |
|---|---|
| Setup time | N / A |
| Playing time | Indefinite |
| Skills required | consuming alcoholic beverages |
Icing is a drinking game in which an individual or a group of individuals are forced to drink a bottle of Smirnoff Ice. The game has been featured on CNN Money/Fortune[1], and ridiculed byCracked.[2]
Participants are encouraged to come up with elaborate ways to present the Smirnoff Ice to their targets by hiding bottles in inconspicuous locations, or in situations where drinking it would be dangerous or embarrassing (e.g. before they drive somewhere, attend a meeting, etc). Failure to drink, no matter the circumstance, results in the humiliation of the victim, and players are encouraged to mistreat those who refuse to play.[2]
[edit]Rules
The game has two rules:[3]
- When presented with a Smirnoff Ice the target must drink it while kneeling. This is referred to as “getting iced”.
- When getting iced, a target can present their own Smirnoff Ice (a “shield”) to cause the original initiator to be “iced” instead. This is referred to as an “Ice Block”.
It is not possible to Ice Block an Ice Block, so if a party attempts an Ice but is instead Ice Blocked, they cannot block again with a second Ice. This prevents situations where potentially infinite Blocking and re-Blocking can occur if parties have a big enough supply of Smirnoff Ice. As a result, more emphasis is placed on Icing strategy, rather than having the biggest supply of Smirnoff Ice. Blocking can also be accomplished with an “Ice Grenade” where the bottle is flung in the air. All bottles are glass though, so this can be a dangerous block.
[edit]Popularity
Icing, which has been described by The New York Times as “the nation’s biggest viral drinking game”[3] grew in popularity shortly after the appearance of the website BrosIcingBros.com began to appear in May 2010.[4] The game has featured some notable victims, including rappers Coolio and Dub P and Dustin Diamond. The goal of an online marketing campaign is to make Ashton Kutcher an Icing victim.[3]
Though less than a month ago, the main site: Bros Icing Bros has been taken down, this phenomenon is still running strong. New sites have popped up including: Icing Count. Furthermore, this game has spread to include “iced coffeeing” as well as “ambusching”. There is expected to be an increase in icing counts as the school year draws closer once the summer lull passes.
There has been some doubt over whether this is an organic phenomenon or if it is merely a marketing stunt by Smirnoff. While Smirnoff has denied any involvement in the game, skeptics still exist. According to some Smirnoff may be in a position where they would want to deny responsibility. Advertising executive Dick Martin has opined “Beyond the implicit slur on the beverage’s taste, I doubt any alcoholic beverage company would want to be associated with a drinking game that stretches the boundaries of good taste and common sense like this one does”. The viral spread of the game has seen a boost in sales for the company.[3] Smirnoff insists that the game is “consumer-generated” and reminded the public to drink responsibly.[3]
funny emails, icing, iced, you got iced
Continue reading about Getting Iced or Icing or You Got Iced is gaining in popularity.
****
“Could never figure out why they didn’t hire me?”
You might find others better looking the more you drink, but it seems the reverse is not also true.
U.S. academic researchers have found evidence of what they call the “imbibing idiot bias.”
The problem is that this bias doesn’t just come into play at 3 a.m. in your favourite bar, but also in the job interview. The study by researchers from the University of Michigan and the University of Pennsylvania found that job applicants who drink alcohol -even if they’re sober during the interview -are perceived to be less intelligent.
“Merely holding an alcoholic beverage may reduce the perceived intelligence of the person,” Scott Rick and Maurice Schweitzer wrote.
So if you meet a prospective employer, whether over lunch or at a social occasion, ditch the drink, even if the employer is holding one -and especially if the employer is not.
In the study’s mock interviews, in which the job-seeker ordered wine after the manager ordered a soft drink (the two choices offered), the job seeker was “especially punished” with low ratings for perceived intelligence, the study said.
FUNNY EMAIL TO FORWARD
Does Wine make you Fat ?
Wine does not make you FAT – it makes you LEAN…
Against tables, chairs, floors, walls and ugly people.
Thought you’d be glad of this news.
