Leroy called Curtis and asked him if he would like to go deer hunting in the morning. Curtis said he would so Leroy told him he would pick him up at 5:00 am. The next morning when Curtis got in the truck he asked Leroy where they were going to hunt. Leroy told him he had a friend that had a huge farm up in Greene County with lots of deer and they could hunt there.
When they got to the farm, Leroy told Curtis to wait in the truck while he went in and told his friend they would be hunting there today. Leroys friend said it was OK, but he needed a favor. His old mule that he had for many years had come up blind and lame. He said he didn’t have the heart to shoot it so would Leroy stop at the field at the top of the hill and put it down. Just leave it where it falls and I’ll bring the backhoe up later and bury it.
Well, Leroy being the big joker that he is thought he would have some fun with Curtis. He got back in the truck just a cussin’ and acting mad as hell. Curtis asked what was wrong and Leroy said “That old bastard told me we couldn’t hunt here today. I’ve bought his seed and fertilizer, paid his vet bills and loaned him money for years and he does me this way.”
Leroy then drives to the top of the hill. He stopped the truck, grabbed his rifle and said there’s the son-of-a-b*tches mule, I’m going to shoot it and see how he likes that. As he was taking aim he heard two more shots. He looked around and Curtis was standing there with his rifle. He said “Hurry up Leroy, I just got two of the old bastards cows.”
funny emails, funny stuff, stupid, dumb, joke
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How is this possible?
I mean, how could anyone make this sign?
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Continue reading about Different Sized Children – Great Sign
Somewhere near Rochester , New York , Ed set out to bag his buck at 5:30 a.m.
By 11:30 a.m., he was exhausted and hungry–and still no buck.
At 12 noon, the mighty hunter Ed, guards the remains
of his lunch while a passer-by snaps a quiet photo
while trying not to startle the deer with a belly laugh.
funny emails
Just incredible!!!
I may be wrong, but it’s quite possible that the driver is a very dumb person!
funny emails, funny picture
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They must have had fun putting these up. If not, they must be really, really dumb.
funny emails, dumb people, funny signs
Two moons on August 27th, 2010
The whole world is waiting for August 27th……….. Planet Mars will be the brightest in the night sky starting August and will look as large as the full moon to the naked eye. This will culminate on August 27th when Mars comes within 34.65M miles of earth. Be sure to watch the sky on August 27th at 12:30 am. It will look like the Earth has 2 moons. The next time Mars comes this close will be in 2287. Share this with your friends as no one alive today will ever see it again.
WRONG
Analysis: False. The text of this rumor was roughly accurate when a version of it first began circulating in the summer of 2003.
It was outdated by the time it went around again in 2005, however, and just plain false when it appeared for the third and fourth times in 2006 and 2007.
It flooded the Internet under the header “Two Moons on August 27″ in 2008, and as a slide show entitled “Mars Spectacular” in 2009.
It’s now 2010. How many times can a “once in a lifetime” event occur?
Here are the facts. Seven years ago, on August 27, 2003, the oscillating orbits of Mars and Earth did, in fact, bring the two planets closer together than at any other time during the past 50,000 years. And though Mars never actually appeared “as large as the full moon to the naked eye” — not even close — it was indeed, for a few special days in 2003, among the brightest objects in the night sky.
October 2005 brought another well-publicized “close encounter,” though in that case Earth and Mars were about 13 million kilometers further apart than during the 2003 event.
Nothing so spectacular is predicted for 2010.
On the BRIGHT side:
There is a very clear sky today, so the chances of seeing Mars and a Beautiful Full Moon should be excellent!
These useful quotes were reportedly taken from actual federal employee performance evaluations:
1. “Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.”
2. “His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.”
3. “I would not allow this employee to breed.”
4. “This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won’t be.”
5. “Works well under constant supervision and when cornered like a rat in a trap.”
6. “When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet.”
7. “He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.”
8. “This young lady has delusions of adequacy.”
9. “He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.”
10. “This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.”
11. “This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better.”
12. “Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.”
13. “A gross ignoramus — 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.”
14. “He doesn’t have ulcers, he’s a carrier.”
15. “I would like to go hunting with him sometime.”
16. “He’s been working with glue too much.”
17. “He would argue with a signpost.”
18. “He has a knack for making strangers immediately.”
19. “He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room.”
20. “When his I.Q. reaches 50 we should sell.”
21. “If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he’s the other one.”
22. “A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.”
23. “A prime candidate for natural deselection.”
24. “Donated his brain to science before he was done using it.”
25. “Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn’t coming.”
26. “Has two brains: one is lost and the other is out looking for it.”
27. “If he were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week.”
28. “If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you’d get change.”
29. “If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.”
30. “It’s hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.”
31. “One neuron short of a synapse.”
32. “Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.”
33. “Takes him 1 1/2 hours to watch 60 minutes.”
34. “The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.”
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Continue reading about More Funny Job Evaluation Comments -Some of the Best!
