Dumb People

HOW IS YOUR ENGLISH?

Wonderful English from Around the World In a Bangkok Temple: IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN. Cocktail lounge, Norway: LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR. Doctor’s office, Rome: SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES. Dry cleaners, Bangkok: DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS. In a Nairobi restaurant: CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE, OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER. On the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi: TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE. On a poster at Kencom: ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN HELP. In a City restaurant: OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS. In a Cemetery: PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS, FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES. Tokyo hotel’s rules and  regulations: GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE, OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED. On the menu of a Swiss Restaurant: OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR. In a Tokyo Bar: SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS. Hotel, Yugoslavia: THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE, IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID. Hotel, Japan: YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID. In the lobby of a Moscow Hotel, across from a Russian Orthodox Monastery: YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY, WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY, EXCEPT THURSDAY. A sign posted in Germany’s Black Forest: IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE, THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT, UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE. Hotel, Zurich: BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF  ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE. Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand: WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS? Airline ticket office, Copenhagen: WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS. (Just Like British Airways!!!) A Laundry in Rome: LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND THEN SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME. And finally the all time classic: Seen in an Abu Dhabi Souk shop window: IF THE FRONT IS CLOSED PLEASE ENTER THROUGH MY BACKSIDE… …. Priceless!

DONALD TRUMP, MITT ROMNEY, NEWT GINGRICH AND GROUNDHOG DAY

This year, both Groundhog Day and the race for the GOP presidential nomination occur at roughly the same time.

It is an ironic similarity of events: one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to creatures of little intelligence for prognostication while the other involves a groundhog. After all they have the brain the size of a walnut, so they don’t have much to work with.

Donald Trump will announce today that he is endorsing

Newt Gingrich

or

someone else.

This just in:

Donald Trump endorsed Mitt Romney for President.

He will not mount an independent campaign if Romney is the Republican nominee.

I wonder if there is any special significance to why he chose Groundhog Day?

The media was full of predictions about who Trump would endorse.

The real headline should be:

Who Cares and Does it Really Matter?

Trump and the Tea Party Candidates remind me of another famous Tea Party with the Mad Hatter

The whole thing is “As mad as a hatter”

~ Meaning Completely Mad.

The following poster was made before the official Trump announcement.

I’ll keep it here just in case Trump changes his mind.

The GOP / Republican Silly season continues to be very interesting. This is especially true, since Donald Trump just can’t seem to stay out of the limelight. His endorsement of a losing candidate is very interesting.

They are all NUTS!

The Nut

When you’ve bats in your belfry that flut,
When your comprenez-vous rope is cut,
When there’s nobody home
In the top of your dome –
Then your head’s not a head; it’s a nut.

Newt Gingrich on the Moon

Newt Gingrich and Natural Disasters

Nobody teaches Icelandic or Hawaiian volcanoes to erupt,
Floods to arise,
Hurricanes to form, 

Nobody teaches how to choose a wife

Nobody understands why

Newt Gingrich is Running for President in 2012

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Natural disasters just happen!!!!!!!!!!

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Recently Michele Bachmann commented on marriage and government ( anti gay statement) ~ “I think that marriage is very important. It is the fundamenta­­l unit of our government­­.”

Then Gingrich should be the best option for President…­he’s done it more often than the rest.

Newt Gingrich is a JOKE!

Newt has said some wild and crazy things—

most are deeply offensive,

while some are outright bizarre.

Here’s the most unhinged Newt-ism,

1989-present.

“I’m running for President.” [5/11/2011]

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Newt Gingrich and Mayan Predictions

How to Say I Love You on Valentine’s Day

IF you are not sure how your lover will respond, then the gift of roses is always a safe bet.

However, if you are a little courageous, try the following unique Valentine’s gifts:

Nothing beats a great Massage!

A Massage is a Great Gift!

For the really courageous  (or stupid), try the iRon.

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Let me know how they respond to this Valentine Gift Coupon!

This little Mini Pig could be a great gift for Valentine’s Day.

Can you imagine her reaction?

MAYAN CALENDAR MISTAKE

The GOP and A Toxic Mess

Huntsman drops out!

“This race has degenerated into an onslaught of negative attacks not worthy of the American people and not worthy of this critical time,” Huntsman said. “At its core, the Republican Party is a party of ideas, but the current toxic form of our political discourse does not help our cause.”

Couldn’t agree more!

America is a great nation with many brilliant people and outstanding leaders.

It’s a shame that the Republican Party

( Tea Party ~ The GOP )

can’t find credible candidates and has made a laughing stock of American politics around the world.

And that’s when the fight started…