Exercise

Final Word on Diet, Nutrition and Health


For  those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health.

It’s a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans..

5. The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION:

Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.


Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - January 9, 2012 at 5:42 am

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, 7. Old Age or Golden Years Jokes, Education, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Fitness For the Golden Years, Funny Pictures, Funny Sayings, Humor, I've learned that..., Inspirational, Interesting Facts, Jokes, Wisdom   Tags: , , , , ,

Ode To The New Year ~ Christmas Diet Fail

Dieting in January

‘Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.

The cookies I’d nibbled, the eggnog I’d taste At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number!

When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).

I’d remember the marvellous meals I’d prepared; The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,

The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese And the way I’d never said, ‘No thank you, please.’

As I dressed myself in my husband’s old shirt And prepared once again to do battle with dirt – I said to myself, as I only can ‘You can’t spend a winter disguised as a man!’

So – away with the last of the sour cream dip, Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip

Every last bit of food that I like must be banished ‘Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won’t have a cookie – not even a lick.

I’ll want only to chew on a long celery stick.

I won’t have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie, I’ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I’m hungry, I’m lonesome, and life is a bore But isn’t that what January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.

Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!

*

 

 

 

*

*

Say Goodbye to 2011

Zeitgeist 2011: Year In Review


Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - December 6, 2011 at 2:04 am

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, 8 Funny Poster of the Day, CHRISTMAS, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Funny Pictures, Great Posters, HAPPY NEW YEAR 2012, Humor, I've learned that..., Interesting Facts, Jokes, New Year's Jokes, Poems, Wisdom   Tags: , , ,

CYBER MONDAY NECK EXERCISES

A few exercises to make your Cyber Monday Shopping less stressful!

and for the end of the day

Life and shopping don’t get any better than this!

 

 

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - November 28, 2011 at 3:30 pm

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, 8 Funny Poster of the Day, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Funny Pictures, Great Pictures, Humor, I've learned that..., In the News, Inspirational, Interesting Facts, Jokes, Poems   Tags:

New Years Resolution 2012 – More Exercise and Walking

“Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.” — Anonymous

*

Why I won’t be walking for Exercise in 2012

Walking can add minutes to your life.

This enables you at 85 years old

to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing

home at $7000 per month.

I like long walks,

especially when they are taken

by people who annoy me.

The only reason I would take up walking

is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to walk early in the morning,

before my brain figures out what I’m doing..

I joined a health club last year,

spent about 400 bucks.

Haven’t lost a pound.

Apparently you have to go there.

Every time I hear the dirty word ‘exercise’,

I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

The advantage of exercising every day

is so when you die, they’ll say,

‘Well, she looks good doesn’t she.’

If you are going to try cross-country skiing,

start with a small country.

I know I got a lot of exercise

the last few years,……

just getting over the hill.

We all get heavier as we get older,

because there’s a lot more information in our heads.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

AND

Every time I start thinking too much

about how I look,

I just find a Happy Hour

and by the time I leave,

I look just fine.

You could run this over to your friends

But just e-mail it to them

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - November 20, 2011 at 8:32 am

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, 7. Old Age or Golden Years Jokes, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Funny Sayings, HAPPY NEW YEAR 2012, Humor, I've learned that..., Inspirational, Interesting Facts, Jokes, New Year's Jokes, Wisdom   Tags: , , , ,

THE 12 WARNING SIGNS OF GOOD HEALTH

*(If several or more appear, you may rarely need to visit a doctor.) 

1. Regular flare-ups of a supportive network of friends and family.

2. Chronic positive expectations.

3. Repeated episodes of gratitude and generosity.

4. Increased appetite for physical activity.

5. Marked tendency to identify and express feelings.

6. Compulsion to contribute to society.

7. Lingering sensitivity to the feelings of others.

8. Habitual behaviour related to seeking new challenges.

9. Craving for peak experiences.

10. Tendency to adapt to changing conditions.

11. Feelings of spiritual involvement.

12. Persistent sense of humor.

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - August 20, 2011 at 6:05 pm

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, 7. Old Age or Golden Years Jokes, Education, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Humor, I've learned that..., In the News, Inspirational, Interesting Facts, Uncategorized   Tags:

The Green Thing

In the line at the store, the cashier told an older woman that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the environment.
The woman apologized to him and explained, “We didn’t have the green thing back in my day.”

The clerk responded, “That’s our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment.”

He was right —  our generation didn’t have the green thing in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the  store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over.  So they really were recycled.

But we didn’t have the green thing back in our day.

We walked up  stairs, because we didn’t have an escalator in every store and  office building. We walked to the grocery store and didn’t climb  into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks.

But she was right. We didn’t have the green thing in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby’s diapers because we didn’t have the throw-away  kind.  We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy  gobbling machine burning up 220 volts — wind and solar power  really did dry the clothes.  Kids got hand-me-down clothes  from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing.  But that old lady is right; we didn’t have the green thing back in our day.

Back then, we  had one TV, or radio, in the house — not a TV in every room.  And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief  (remember them?), not a screen the size of the state of  Montana.

In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn’t have  electric     machines to do everything for  us.

When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used a wadded up old newspaper to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap.

Back  then, we didn’t fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power.  We exercised by working so we didn’t need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.

But she’s right;  we didn’t have the green thing back then.

We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water.

We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull.

But we didn’t have the green thing back then.

Back then,  people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to  school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service.

We had one  electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances.  And we didn’t need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites  2,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest pizza joint.

But  isn’t it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn’t have the green thing back then?

Please forward this on to another selfish old person who needs a lesson in conservation from a smart ass young person.

The  Green Thing


Have the best day!

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - June 3, 2011 at 3:10 pm

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, 7. Old Age or Golden Years Jokes, Education, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Humor, I've learned that..., Inspirational, Interesting Facts, Wisdom   Tags: , , ,

High Gas Prices

What is President Obama’s new fitness program to get people walking again?

*
Gas Prices at over $4.00 a Gallon!

Maybe I’ll try biking again!

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - May 11, 2011 at 8:45 am

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, 8 Funny Poster of the Day, Dumb People, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Funny Pictures, Great Pictures, Humor, I've learned that..., In the News, Interesting Facts, Jokes   Tags:

How the Easter Bunny Stays in Shape

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - April 15, 2011 at 8:55 pm

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, 8 Funny Poster of the Day, Easter Pictures Jokes Poems Animations, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Funny Pictures, Great Pictures, Great Posters, Humor, I've learned that..., Interesting Facts, Jokes, Kids/Children   Tags: , , , ,

Get Fit ~ Get a Dog

Spring is in the air and many people figure it’s time to keep those new year’s resolutions about improving fitness. Instead of the latest fitness equipment consider a dog!

Recent Studies have concluded that a dog might be a better get-fit motivator than a treadmill will ever be.

It’s obvious that dog owners are more likely to take regular walks than those of us who live canine-free. But these studies are stating that dog-walkers are typically more active in general than those of us without pets.

Of the regular dog-walkers they studied, 60 per cent of them met the federal (U.S.) criterion for moderate or vigorous exercise (30 minutes a day, five days a week). Only about a third of the dog-free study participants got that much regular exercise. And, yes, some of those dog-free individuals have gym memberships.

Slow walk or fast?

For more info (humor) on the Importance of Walking, please check out the link below:

http://www.e-forwards.com/2010/08/the-importance-of-walking/

 

 

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - March 21, 2011 at 7:43 am

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, Exercise, Fitness For the Golden Years, Funny Pictures, Great Pictures, Humor, I've learned that..., In the News, Interesting Facts, Jokes   Tags: , ,

2012 New Years Resolution – Dieting and Exercise

2007: I will get my weight down below 180 pounds.
2008: I will follow my new diet religiously until I get below 200 pounds.
2009: I will develop a realistic attitude about my weight.
2010: I will work out 3 days a week.
2011: I will try to drive past a gym at least once a week.

2012: Repeat 2007′s resolution….

Sounds like a plan!

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by John - December 29, 2010 at 7:24 am

Categories: 1. Funny Email Forwards, 2. FUNNY EMAILS, Dumb People, Email Delanteros Humor Interesante, email Forwards, Exercise, Fitness For the Golden Years, Funny Sayings, HAPPY NEW YEAR 2012, Humor, I've learned that..., Inspirational, Interesting Facts, Jokes, Uncategorized   Tags:

Next Page »