John on September 2nd, 2010

Little Johnny was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. The neighbor was curious and wanted to know what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, so he politely asked,”What are you up to there, Little Johnny?” “My goldfish died,” replied Little Johnny tearfully, without looking up, “and I’ve just buried him.” The neighbor was concerned, “That’s an awfully big grave for a goldfish, isn’t it?” Little Johnny patted down the last heap of earth then replied, “That’s because he’s inside your stupid cat.”

****

Some might say Poor CAT!

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John on August 29th, 2010

Little Johnny’s kindergarten teacher was trying to teach the children to “people talk”.

She asked Joey, ” What did you do on the weekend?”

Joey replied, ” I went to see Nana”. “No.” the teacher said,”You went to see your Grandma. That’s people talk. Bobby, What did you do on the weekend?”

Bobby replied, ” I went for a ride on the choochoo.” No, you went for a ride on the train.”

“Little Johnny, what did you do on the weekend?”

He replied, “I stayed home and read a book.”

“That’s nice, what was the name of the book?”

Little Johnny thought for a while and then said,

“Winnie the Sh…!”

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John on August 29th, 2010

A teacher asked Little Johnny ,

“Can people predict the future with cards?”

His response was, “My mother can.”

The teacher replied, “Really?”

Little Johnny was quick to explain,

“Yes, she takes one look at my report card and tells me what will happen when my father gets home.”

Little Johnny’s ReportA teacher asked Little Johnny ,“Can people predict the future with cards?”His response was, “My mother can.”The teacher replied, “Really?”Little Johnny was quick to explain,“Yes, she takes one look at my report card and tells me what will happen when my father gets home.”

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John on August 29th, 2010


A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, ‘Everyone who thinks they’re stupid, stand up!’ After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.. The teacher said, ‘Do you think you’re stupid, Little Johnny?’ ‘No, ma’am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!’



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John on August 21st, 2010

On the way home from the christening of his baby brother in church,  Little Johnny sat in the back seat, unusually quiet and sad.
His father noticed him crying and asked,

“What’s wrong, little Johnny?”

Between sniffles little Johnny replied, “That priest said he
wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I want
to stay with you!!”

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John on August 21st, 2010

A Sunday School teacher was telling the children that God created everything, including human beings.

Little Johnny became fascinated when the teacher told him how Eve was made out of one of Adam’s ribs.

Later that week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were in pain, and asked, Johnny, what’s the matter sweetie?  Little Johnny replied, “I have a pain in my side!  I think I’m going to have a wife!”


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John on August 21st, 2010


When he arrived home from school, Little Johnny’s mother asked him, “How did school go today?

“Fine”, Little Johnny replied. “We had a new teacher and she wanted to know if I had any brothers and I told her I was an only child”.

What did she say?” his mother asked.

“ She said, “Thank goodness”.

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John on August 21st, 2010


The fourth grade teacher received a telephone call one morning. The husky voice on the phone said, “Will you excuse Little Johnny from school today?”
“Who is this”? the teacher asked. The voice answered. “ This is my father speaking”.

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John on August 7th, 2010

During an art class, Little Johnny’s teacher asked Little Johnny what he was going to draw. He answered, “God!”

She said, ” Oh Johnny, no one knows what God looks like!”

Little Johnny answered, “They will in a minute.”

Little Johnny

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