Poems

Christmas Diet Poem

Oh greed is the curse of many a maid

Munching mince pies, quaffing sweet lemonade

With never a thought about midriff bulge

She procedes without caution to over indulge

And then when the scale shows a figure quite shocking

She opens the diet book

That was stuffed in her stocking.

 Poet unknown

Ode To The New Year ~ Christmas Diet Fail

‘Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.

The cookies I’d nibbled, the eggnog I’d taste At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number!

When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).

I’d remember the marvellous meals I’d prepared; The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,

The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese And the way I’d never said, ‘No thank you, please.’

As I dressed myself in my husband’s old shirt And prepared once again to do battle with dirt – I said to myself, as I only can ‘You can’t spend a winter disguised as a man!’

So – away with the last of the sour cream dip, Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip

Every last bit of food that I like must be banished ‘Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won’t have a cookie – not even a lick.

I’ll want only to chew on a long celery stick.

I won’t have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie, I’ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I’m hungry, I’m lonesome, and life is a bore But isn’t that what January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.

Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!

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Say Goodbye to 2011

Zeitgeist 2011: Year In Review

Happy December

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“From December to March, there are for many of us three gardens - 
the garden outdoors, 
the garden of pots and bowls in the house, 
and the garden of the mind’s eye.”
-   Katherine S. White

“All the leaves are brown
And the sky is grey
I went for a walk
On a winter’s day
I’d be safe and warm
If I was in L.A.
California dreamin’
On such a winter’s day.”
-  Mammas and Pappas, California Dreamin

“On the first day of winter,
the earth awakens to the cold touch of itself.
Snow knows no other recourse except
this falling, this sudden letting go
over the small gnomed bushes, all the emptying trees.
Snow puts beauty back into the withered and malnourished,
into the death-wish of nature and the deliberate way
winter insists on nothing less than deference.
waiting all its life, snow says, “Let me cover you.”
-   Laura Lush, The First Day of Winter

“So now is come our joyful feast,
Let every man be jolly;
Each room with ivy leaves is dressed,
And every post with holly.
Though some churls at our mirth repine,
Round your foreheads garlands twine,
Drown sorrow in a cup of wine,
And let us all be merry.

Now all our neighbors’ chimneys smoke,
And Christmas blocks are burning;
Their ovens they with baked meats choke,
And all their spits are turning.
Without the door let sorrow lie,
And if for cold it hap to die,
We’ll bury it in a Christmas pie,
And evermore be merry.”
-   George Wither, A Christmas Tale

CYBER MONDAY NECK EXERCISES

A few exercises to make your Cyber Monday Shopping less stressful!

and for the end of the day

Life and shopping don’t get any better than this!

Happy Thanksgiving – Poems for our US Friends

Happy Thanksgiving

May your Thanksgiving be blessed with
The bounty of the Season
Love of Friends and Family
And a Harvest of Smiles…

Thanksgiving Time

When all the leaves are off the boughs,

And nuts and apples gathered in,

And cornstalks waiting for the cows,

And pumpkins safe in barn and bin,

Then Mother says, “My children dear,

The fields are brown, and autumn flies;

Thanksgiving Day is very near,

And we must make thanksgiving pies!”

~~Author Unknown.~~

How to observe Thanksgiving.

Count your blessings instead of your crosses;

Count your gains instead of your losses.

Count your joys instead of your woes;

Count your friends instead of your foes.

Count your smiles instead of your tears;

Count your courage instead of your fears.

Count your full years instead of your lean;

Count your kind deeds instead of your mean.

Count your health instead of your wealth;

Count on God instead of yourself.

~~Author Unknown.~~

Thanksgiving

The year has turned its circle,

The seasons come and go.

The harvest all is gathered in

And chilly north winds blow.

Orchards have shared their treasures,

The fields, their yellow grain,

So open wide the doorway —

Thanksgiving comes again!

~~Old Rhyme.~~

Remembering the horrors of Black November…

When I was a young turkey, new to the coop,
My big brother Mike took me out on the stoop;
Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow,
And he told me there was something that I had to know.
His look and his tone I will always remember,
When he told me of the horrors of ‘Black November’…

“Come about August, now listen to me,
Each day you’ll get six meals instead of just three,
And soon you’ll be thick, where once you were thin,
And you’ll grow a big rubbery thing under your chin.

And then one morning, when you’re warm in your bed,
In’ll burst the farmer’s wife, and hack off your head;
Then she’ll pluck out all your feathers so you’re bald ‘n pink,
And scoop out all your insides and leave ya lyin’ in the sink.”

Well, the rest of his words were too grim to repeat,
I sat on the stoop like a winged piece of meat;
And decided on the spot that to avoid being cooked,
I’d have to lay low and remain overlooked.

I began a new diet of nuts and granola,
High-roughage salads, juice and diet cola;
And as they ate pastries, chocolates and grapes,
I stayed in my room doing Jane Fonda tapes;

I maintained my weight of two pounds and a half,
And tried not to notice when the bigger birds laughed;
But ’twas I who was laughing, under my breath,
As they chomped and they chewed, ever closer to death;

And sure enough when Black November rolled around,
I was the last turkey left in the entire compound;
So now I’m a pet in the farmer’s wife’s lap;
I haven’t a worry, so I eat and I nap.

She held me today, while sewing and humming,
And smiled at me and said, “Christmas is coming!”

Thanksgiving Poem – Funny

Happy Thanksgiving Poems

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AUTUMN IS NATURE’S MASTERPIECE

When every tree’s aglow;

Before the leaves have fallen

And the hills are white with snow.

The bounty of the harvest

Is a treasure to behold,

For the fruits of our labor

Are more valuable than gold.

There’s a change in the weather

That fills the heart with cheer;

With the holidays approaching

In the twilight of the year.

There’s a feeling of Thanksgiving

That comes to one and all;

When we count our many blessings

As the leaves begin to fall.

Poet: Clay Harrison

Veterans Day Poster November 11

Lest we forget…

“Recessional,”

God of our fathers, known of old—
Lord of our far-flung battle line—
Beneath whose awful hand we hold
Dominion over palm and pine—
Lord God of Hosts, be with us yet,
Lest we forget—lest we forget!

Rudyard Kipling

They went with songs to the battle, they were young.

Straight of limb, true of eyes, steady and aglow.

They were staunch to the end against odds uncounted,

They fell with their faces to the foe.

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old:

Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.

At the going down of the sun and in the morning,

We will remember them.

Lest we forget…

The “Ode of Remembrance” is an ode taken from Laurence Binyon’s poem “For the Fallen“

Funny and Spooky Halloween Sayings and Poems

Double, double, toil and trouble; fire burn and cauldron bubble

William Shakespeare

As spirits roam the neighborhoods at night,

Let loose upon the Earth till it be light…

~Nicholas Gordon, poemsforfree.com

Eat, drink and be scary.  ~Author Unknown

Pixie, kobold, elf, and sprite,

All are on their rounds tonight;

In the wan moon’s silver ray,

Thrives their helter-skelter play.

~Joel Benton

When witches go riding,

and black cats are seen,

the moon laughs and whispers,

‘tis near Halloween.

~Author Unknown

From ghoulies and ghosties

And long-leggedy beasties

And things that go bump in the night,

Good Lord, deliver us!

~Scottish Saying

Eye of new, and toe of frog,

Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,

Adder’s fork, and blind-worm’s sting,

Lizard’s leg, and howlet’s wing,

For a charm of powerful trouble,

Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

William Shakespeare

Come with me

All Hallow’s night

We’ll frighten everyone in sight

Such pranks for ince,are justified

And fun and frolic amplified.

Pixie, kobold, elf, and sprite,

All are on their rounds tonight;

In the wan moon’s silver ray,

Thrives their helter-skelter play.

By Joel Benton

What fearful shapes and shadows beset his path, amidst the dim and ghastly glare of a snowy night! With what wistful look did he eye every trembling ray of light streaming across the waste fields from some distant window! How often was he appalled by some shrub covered with snow, which, like a sheeted spectre, beset his very path! How often did he shrink with curdling awe at the sound of his own steps on the frosty crust beneath his feet; and dread to look over his shoulder, lest he should behold some uncouth being tramping close behind him! and how often was he thrown into complete dismay by some rushing blast, howling among the trees, in the idea that it was the Galloping Hessian on one of his nightly scourings!

Washington Irving, The Legend of Sleepy Hollow

A gypsy fire is on the hearth,

Sign of the carnival of mirth;

Through the dun fields and from the glade

Flash merry folk in masquerade,

For this is Hallowe’en!

~Author Unknown

Shadows of a thousand years

rise again unseen,

Voices whisper in the trees,

“Tonight is Halloween!”

Dexter Kozen

On Hallowe’en the thing you must do

Is pretend that nothing can frighten you

And if somethin’ scares you and you want to run

Just let on like it’s Hallowe’en fun.

~Author Unknown

By the pricking of my thumbs

Something wicked this way comes.

William Shakespeare

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Eat, drink and be scary. ~Author Unknown

Happy Thanksgiving 2011

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