Relationships

Grandparents are Funny

Grandparents are funny!

“Grandparents are a delightful blend of laughter,

caring deeds, wonderful stories and love.” 

-Author Unknown

The idea that no one is perfect is a view

most commonly held by people with no grandchildren.

~Doug Larson

• Grandparents are a family’s greatest treasure, the founders of a loving legacy, The greatest storytellers, the keepers of traditions that linger on in cherished memory. Grandparents are the family’s strong foundation. Their very special love sets them apart. Through happiness and sorrow, through their special love and caring, grandparents keep a family close at heart. ~author unknown
• Surely, two of the most satisfying experiences in life must be those of being a grandchild or a grandparent. ~Donald A. Norberg

• • Grandparents bring about a side that you probably wish that’s how your parents dealt with you while you were a child. Abundance of indulgence and unwavering love. ~ author unknown

  • Even young grandparents seem enormously old to a small child, although the child may politely deny it. One small girl, feeling proud of reaching the monumental age of four, turned to her young-looking grandmother and asked, “How come I’m so old if you’re so new?” ~Alison Judson Ryerson
  • What is it about grandparents that is so lovely? I’d like to say that grandparents are God’s gifts to children. And if they can but see, hear and feel what these people have to give, they can mature at a fast rate. ~Bill Cosby
  • Grandparents are similar to a piece of string – handy to have around and easily wrapped around the fingers of their grandchildren. ~Author Unknown

WISHES FOR MY MOM ON MOTHER’S DAY

These are my WISHES FOR MY MOM ON MOTHER’S DAY

I LOVE YOU MOM.

THESE ARE MY WISHES FOR YOU ON MOTHER’S DAY

AND EVERY DAY OF THE YEAR!

The best medicine in the world is a mother’s kiss.
- Anonymous

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
- Mark Twain

My mom is a never-ending song in my heart of comfort, happiness, and being. I may sometimes forget the words but I always remember the tune. - UNKNOWN

You never appreciate all of the things your mother did for you until you find yourself doing the same things for your kids.

- Linda Poindexter

Do you believe in miracles? I do, because having you in my life certainly seems like a miracle every single day. I love you mom.  Unknown

Don’t Forget Mother’s Day

Don’t Forget Mother’s Day!!!

MOTHER’S DAY  May 12, 2013

Canada, USA

Mother’s Day is a very special day for honoring Mothers around the world. Mother’s Day holds great significance for all of us.

Mother’s Day / Mothering Sunday Date UK:
2013 – March 10

Inspirational Mommy Quotes

• “When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.” – Sophia Loren
• “Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.” - Lin Yutang
• “A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take.” - Cardinal Mermillod
• “A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.” - Tenneva Jordan
• “To a child’s ear, “mother” is magic in any language.” - Arlene Benedict
• “There is no way to be a perfect mother, and a million ways to be a good one” - Jill Churchill
• “To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power.” - Maya Angelou
• “A mother’s heart is the child’s classroom.” - Henry Ward Beecher
•  “You don’t really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around – and why his parents will always wave back.” - William D. Tammeus
• “Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.” - Oprah Winfrey
• “Some are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same; and most mothers kiss and scold together.” - Pearl S. Buck
• “Mama was my greatest teacher, a teacher of compassion, love and fearlessness. If love is sweet as a flower, then my mother is that sweet flower of love.” - Stevie Wonder

Visit the following link for more Mother’s Day Fun, Poems, Gift Ideas, Beautiful pictures,

and Free Animations:

http://mothersdayfunontheweb.blogspot.com/

My Mother Taught Me!

• 
• My Mother taught me about ‘anticipation.’
  “Just wait until your father gets home.”
  My Mother taught me to ‘meet a challenge.’
  “What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you! Don’t talk back to me!”
  My Mother taught me ‘logic.’
• “If you fall out off that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”
• You spend a half hour searching for your sunglasses only to have your teenager say, “Mom, why don’t you wear the ones you pushed up on your head?”
• You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school!
• 
• My mother taught me about ‘hypocrisy.’
  “If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”
  My mother taught me the ‘circle of Life.’
  “I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”
• 
  My mother taught me about ‘behavior modification.’
  “Stop acting like your father!”
• For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house.
  One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event.
  The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, “Tommy, whatever has become of that baby brother or sister you were expecting at home?”
  Tommy burst into tears and confessed, “I think Mommy ate it!”
• Mother to daughter advice:
  Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day.
  But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.
• The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she’d have children if she had it to do over again. “Yes,” she replied. “But not the same ones.
• 

Check out the following site for more jokes, stories, free animations and poems about Mother’s Day:

http://mothersdayfunontheweb.blogspot.com/

Poems About Grandma

I love walking with Grandma!

GRANDMOTHER

Grandmother you are like a patchwork quilt
So cozy and warm.
Just the smell of coffee
Reminds me of your wisdom and charm.

I know I can always come to you
When lost or alone.
For you always comfort me
And make me feel at home.

You are the silver lining of a cloudy day.
And I know whom can trust
when clouds blow my way.
Grandmother, your hugs and kisses
Will be stored in my heart each day.

~Author Unknown~

GRANDMA

Ever since the day I was born.
You have nurtured me with love and kindness.
You have been someone I can believe in,
And someone I can depend upon.
In this world I am just staring to understand.
And it’s important to me that you know
How grateful that I am,
For all that you give to me,
For all that you teach me,
And for the strength I will always have,
Because of you, grandma.

~Author Unknown~

WHAT ARE GRANDMAS FOR?

Grandmas are for stories
about things of long ago.
Grandmas are for caring
about all the things you know…
Grandmas are for rocking you
and singing you to sleep,
Grandmas are for giving you
nice memories to keep…
Grandmas are for knowing
all the things you’re dreaming of…
But, most importantly of all,
grandmas are for love.

~Author Unknown~

Romance and Old Age

I wonder if Romance and Old Age will really be like this?

An older couple were lying in bed. The husband was falling asleep but the wife was in a romantic mood, and she wanted to talk.

She said: “You used to hold my hand when we were courting.”

Wearily he reached across, held her hand for a second and tried to get back to sleep.

A few moments later she said: “Then you used to kiss me.”

Mildly irritated, he reached across, gave her a peck on the cheek and settled down to sleep.

Thirty seconds later she said: “Then you used to bite my neck.”

Angrily, he threw back the bed clothes and got out of bed. “Where are you going?” she asked.

“To get my teeth!”

Spoiling My Grandkids

I am a new Grandparent.

Always thought I would be a wonderful Grandparent and enjoy spoiling my Grandkids.

I believe it’s our right to spoil our Grandkids.

Grandparents seem to have an innate desire to protect, love and spoil.

Spoiling Grandchildren is as natural as breathing.

It’s beyond our control!

But, how am I going to compete with this?

Grandparents Steve and Jeri Wakefield of Dallas

wanted to give their two grandsons the treehouse of their dreams.

And they did!

It’s one thing to be spoiled and another to be spoiled rotten! 

That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it!

My attempt above.

Hope my grandkids never google ~ best tree forts!!!!

‘You don’t spoil your grandchildren do you? A:’Not this morning, I haven’t seen them yet.’

What children need most are the essentials that grandparents provide in abundance.  They give unconditional love, kindness, patience, humor, comfort, lessons in life.  And, most importantly, cookies.  ~Rudolph Giuliani

I always give my grandkids a couple of quarters when they go home.  It’s a bargain.  ~Gene Perret

When grandparents enter the door, discipline flies out the window.  ~Ogden Nash

To All Smart Women

To all smart women  – ha ha ! 

In Time For Mother’s Day

If you send this to just one person,

it should make it all the way around in time for

Mother’s Day.

Sunday, May 12  Mother’s Day 2013

This is for all the mothers who froze their buns off on metal bleachers at football games Friday night instead of watching from cars, so that when their kids asked, “Did you see me?” they could say, “Of course, I wouldn’t have missed it for the world,” and mean it.

This is for all the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying, “It’s OK honey, Mommy’s here.”

This is for all the mothers of war torn countries who fled in the night and can’t find their children.

This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they’ll never see.

And the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.

For all the mothers of the victims of recent shootings, and the mothers of the murderers.

For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of their TVs in horror, hugging their child who just came home from school, safely.

For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween costumes.

And all the mothers who DON’T.

What makes a good Mother anyway?

Is it patience?

Compassion?

Broad hips?

The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time?

Or is it heart?

Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time?

The jolt that takes you from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. to put your hand on the back of a sleeping baby?

The need to flee from wherever you are and hug your child when you hear news of a school shooting, a fire, a car accident, a baby dying?

So this is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and explained all about making babies.

And for all the mothers who wanted to but just couldn’t.

This is for reading “Goodnight, Moon” twice a night for a year. And then reading it again. “Just one more time.”

This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store and swat them in despair and stomp their feet like a tired 2-year old who wants ice cream before dinner.

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoelaces before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted for Velcro instead.

For all the mothers who bite their lips sometimes until they bleed – when their 14 year olds dye their hair green.

Who lock themselves in the bathroom when babies keep crying and won’t stop.

This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purse.

This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to sink a jump shot.

This is for all mothers whose heads turn automatically when a little voice calls “Mom?” in a crowd, even though they know their own off spring are at home.

This is for mothers who put pinwheels and teddy bears on their children’s graves.

This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can’t find the words to reach them.

This is for all the mothers who sent their sons to school with stomachaches, assuring them they’d be just FINE once they got there, only to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick them up. Right away.

This is for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation.

And mature mothers learning to let go.

For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.

Single mothers and married mothers.

Mothers with money, mothers without.

This is for you all.

So hang in there.

Please pass along to all the moms in your life.

“Home is what catches you when you fall – and we all fall.”

More information for Mother’s Day at:
http://mothersdayfunontheweb.blogspot.com/

Tiger Woods and The Masters Illegal Drop Scandal

Tiger Woods was assessed a two stoke penalty at the Masters for an illegal drop!

Who called in to let the officials know that Tiger Woods took an illegal drop?

There are a number of conspiracy theories

but many believe that the call was from Sweden.

Apparently a beautiful Swedish viewer was the caller!

Elin Nordegren?????????

The Masters Rules committee says a 2 stroke penalty is enough!

The Golf Channel “experts” say he should disqualify himself.

What do think Tiger Woods should do after being told he made an illegal drop.

Some say:

1. He should be disqualified.

2. Tiger Woods’ Penalty Should Have Been Assessed On The Spot Or Not At All

2. A two stroke penalty is enough

4. Tiger should continue to play

5. Tiger Woods should disqualify himself

If  Tiger Woods disqualifies himself from the masters for the illegal drop, one thing is certain. TV ratings will go way down. Most of the “experts”, who are fuelling this scandal,  on the Golf Channel should realize that their jobs probably wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for Tiger!

Tiger Woods and The Masters Illegal Drop Scandal

 to be continued…