John on January 8th, 2010

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John on January 7th, 2010

24

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John on January 4th, 2010

day_in_the_internet_01

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John on January 3rd, 2010

A little boy goes to his father and asks “Daddy, how was I born?”

The father answers, “Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! 

Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. 

Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. 

We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. 

As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little pop-up appeared that said: 


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(scroll down to read) 

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“You Got Male!

Baby

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John on December 22nd, 2009

before-there-were-PCs

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John on December 22nd, 2009

backup-your-computer

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John on December 22nd, 2009

Googling_yourself

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John on December 22nd, 2009

from The Backwoods Guide to Computer Lingo by Dave Nilsen. Illustrations were created by Dennis Cox at DJArt & Design (www.djart.com).

LOG ON:

Making a wood stove hot
LOG OFF:

Too much wood on fire
MONITOR:

Keep’n an eye on the wood stove
DOWN LOAD:

Gitten the farwood off’n the truck
MEGA HERTZ:
When yer not keerfull gitten the farwood
FLOPPY DISC:

Whatcha git from tryin to tote too much farwood
RAM:

That thar thang what splits the farwood
HARD DRIVE:

Gitten home in the winter time
WINDOWS:

Whut to shut when its cold outside
SCREEN:

Whut to shut when its black fly season
BYTE:

Whut dem dang flys do
CHIP:

Munchies fer the TV
MICRO CHIP:

Whut’s in the bottom of the munchie bag

MODEM:

Whatcha do to the hay fields

DOT MATRIX:

Ole Dan Matrix’s wife
LAP TOP:

Whar the kitty sleeps
KEYBOARD:

Whar you hang the dang truck keys

SOFTWARE:

Dem dang plastic forks and knifes

MOUSE:

What eats the grain in the barn
MOUSE PAD:


That’s hippie talk fer where the mouse lives

MAINFRAME:

Holds up the barn roof
PORT:

Fancy flatlander wine

ENTER:

Notherner talk fer “C’Mon in y’all”

CLICK:

Whut you hear when you cock yer gun
DOUBLE CLICK:

When you cock the double barrel
REBOOT:

Whut you have to do right before bedtime
when you have to go to the outhouse

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Jayzoo on December 20th, 2009

Safety Helmet

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