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The Old Man and the Talking Frog

An 86 year old fisherman was sitting in his boat one day when he heard a voice say, ‘Pick me up.’ He looked around and couldn’t see any one. He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say again,‘Pick me up.’ He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog. The man said, ‘Are you talking to me?’ The frog said, ‘Yes, I’m talking to you. Pick me up. Then, kiss me and I’ll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen. I’ll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous because you will have me as your bride.’ The old fisherman looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up carefully, and placed it in his front breast pocket. Then the frog said, ‘What are you nuts? Didn’t you hear what I said? I said kiss me and I will be your beautiful bride.’ He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said, ‘Nah, at my age I’d rather have a talking frog.’

Easter Chocolate is Good For You

New Study reveals

that chocolate

and

exercise

is good for you

~

It can help you stay thinner!

 Should make for the best Easter ever!

Eat an Easter egg before each meal. 
It’ll take the edge off your appetite, and that way you’ll eat less.

Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

“There’s nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with CHOCOLATE.” Linda Grayson, “The Pickwick Papers”

Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
Because no one wants to quit.

THE 12-STEP CHOCOHOLICS PROGRAM: NEVER BE MORE THAN 12 STEPS AWAY FROM CHOCOLATE!

Put “eat chocolate” at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you’ll get one thing done.

Good Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Easter Sunday. 
Bad Idea: Finding Easter eggs at Thanksgiving.

Chocolate Rabbit

I got a chocolate rabbit
For an Easter treat,
A great big chocolate rabbit
Good enough to eat.

So I ate his ears on Sunday,
His nose I finished Monday.
Tuesday I nibbled on his feet.
I ate his tail on Wednesday
Thursday I kept on,
By Friday he was going,
Saturday he was gone.

Oh, I loved my chocolate rabbit
From the moment that he came,
And if I get another one,
I’ll love him just the same.

We love you, Easter Bunny!

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!

NEW RESEARCH SUGGESTS THAT IT IS BEST TO EAT CHOCOLATE IN THE MORNING. 

If it ain’t chocolate, it ain’t breakfast!

HAPPY EASTER

Newt Gingrich Prays For Win

Newt was very depressed because he hadn’t being doing very well in the GOP primaries for quite some time. He was no where near the 1,144 delegates needed to secure the Republican Party nomination. In fact, his popularity was so low, he was considering dropping out and supporting someone else. (whoever would give him the best political appointment).

It would take a miracle for him to get back in the running.

So he turned to heaven and prayed. “Lord, take pity on me. If you let me be successful in the next Primary, and help me get back in the race, I’ll give half my fortune to charity and stay faithful to my wife for the rest of my life.”

Miraculously, during the next Primary election, Newt was the very clear winner.
He looked up again and said to God, ‘Never mind, I did it myself.’

Take that!

Easter Bunny Footprint Templates

Cute Easter Bunny Footprints

St. Patrick’s Day Lucky email Forward

 
May God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you..
OK, this is what you have to do…Send this to all of your friends! 

Fields Of Shamrocks ~ Happy St. Patrick’s Day

Ahh Saint Patrick’s Day.

You may or may not believe in Leprechauns,

fields of shamrocks,

 that pots of gold are hidden at the ends of rainbows,

or that wearing green is lucky.

But you should believe that there is no shortage of Irish spirit for St. Patty’s Day

~ the liquid Spirit that is!

St. Patrick’s Day brings sloshing mugs of green beer,

great music and parties that last into the wee hours of the morning.

The festivities only come around once a year and are not to be missed.

But be careful that you don’t over indulge!

One of the reason’s  St. Patrick’s Day is so popular is that

it takes place just a few days before the first day of spring.

Therefore making it the first green of spring.

St. Patrick’s Day Verses, Poems, Toasts and Blessings

***

Irish Sayings

Leprechauns, castles, good luck and laughter.
Lullabies, dreams and love ever after.
A thousand welcomes when anyone comes…
That’s the Irish for You!

Irish Toasts

May your pockets be heavy and your heart be light, may good luck pursue you each morning and night.

May the roof above us never fall in, and may we friends gathered below never fall out.

A trout in the pot is better than a salmon in the sea.

As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point in the wrong direction.

A friend’s eye is a good mirror.

May you live as long as you want, and never want as long as you live.

He who loses money, loses much; He who loses a friend, loses more; He who loses faith, loses all.

May the Lord keep you in His hand and never close His fist too tight.

May your neighbors respect you, trouble neglect you, the angels protect you, and heaven accept you.

May the sound of happy music, and the lilt of Irish laughter, fill your heart with gladness, that stays forever after.

May the hinges of our friendship never grow rusty. And our ale never turn musty.

St. Patrick’s Day is an enchanted time — a day to begin transforming winter’s dreams into summer’s magic.

“Maybe it’s bred in the bone, but the sound of pipes is a little bit of heaven to some of us.” ~ Nancy O’Keefe

“There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting.” ~ John Millington Synge

When Irish eyes are smiling

When Irish eyes are smiling

Sure it’s like a morning spring.

In the lilt of Irish laughter,

You can hear the angels sing.

When Irish hearts are happy,

All the world seems bright and gay.

And when Irish eyes are smiling,

Sure, they steal your heart away.

Irish Blessings

May you live to be a hundred years,
With one extra year to repent.

**

May the road rise up to meet you,

may the wind be always at your back,

May the sun shine warm upon your face,

and the rain fall soft upon your fields,

and until we meet again,

May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

**

May your thoughts be as glad as the shamrocks,

May your heart be as light as a song,

May each day bring you bright, happy hours,

That stay with you all the year long.
**

May the Irish hills caress you.

May her lakes and rivers bless you.

May the luck of the Irish enfold you.

May the blessings of Saint Patrick behold you.
**

May you have: A world of wishes at your command. God and his angels close to hand. Friends and family their love to impart, and Irish blessings deep in your heart!

May you have warm words on a cold evening, a full moon on a dark night,and the road downhill all the way to your door.

May your pockets be heavy and your heart be light, and may good luck pursue you each morning and night.

May your blessings outnumber the Shamrocks that grow, and may trouble avoid you wherever you go.

Honest work to occupy you.

A hearty appetite to sustain you.

A good woman to love you.

And a wink from the God above.

**

May you live a long life, full of gladness and health. With a pocket full of gold, as the least of your wealth.

May the dreams you hold dearest, be those which come true. The kindness you spread, keep returning to you.

May the friendships you make, be those which endure; and all of your grey clouds, be small ones for sure.

And trusting in Him, to Whom we all pray; May a song fill your heart, every step of the way.

Ode to the Shamrock

There’s a dear little plant that grows in our isle,

‘Twas St. Patrick himself, sure, that sets it;

And the sun of his labor with pleasure did smile,

And with dew from his eye often wet it.

It grows through the bog, through the brake, through the mireland,

And they call it the dear little Shamrock of Ireland.

HAPPY HOLI ~ The Festival of Colours

HAPPY HOLI: The Fire Festival

The Hindu Fire Festival, called Holi or Basaat is celebrated

in India on the fifteenth day of the Light Half of the Moon, 

in the Hindu month of Phalguna (March).

Holi is a spring festival for Hindus.

It is celebrated before the monsoon, 

the great rainstorms which come each year.

It is also known as Festival of Colours. Every year it is celebrated on the day after the full moon in early March and glorifies good harvest and fertility of the land. Holi is well known for the rutuals attached to it. The best known is the smearing of coloured powder on each other, and throwing coloured and scented water.

Holi is a joyous holiday and is celebrated by Hindus of all
ages. Boys and girls squirt water pistols,

sometimes large pumps filled with saffron or red-colored water.

The Hindus favorite
colors are red, crimson and saffron.

From wikipedia:

It is also known as Do?aj?ta (Oriya)  in Orissa and Dol Jatra (Bengali) or Basantotsav (“spring festival”) (Bengali) in West Bengal.

What Bugs You? ~ The Republican Presidential Race Bugs Me!

IT’S SUPER TUESDAY TIME

OR 

AS MANY PEOPLE AROUND THE WORLD SAY

It’s Howdy Doody Time

There are a few things out there that are universally annoying

– like fingernails on a blackboard

or

the GOP candidates.

“It’s extremely well-established, when you’re

getting lower-quality information coming in,

you’re having to work harder to understand and reconstruct it.”

Now I know why the GOP Candidates bug me so much.

Even Barbara Bush thinks that the GOP Race is a cause for embarrassment for America: 

 ”The current political atmosphere was the worst she could remember. “I think the rest of the world is looking at us these days and saying, ‘What are you doing?” she said.

America is a great nation with many brilliant people and outstanding leaders.

It’s a shame that the Republican Party

( Tea Party ~ The GOP )

can’t find credible candidates and has made a laughing stock of American politics around the world.

WHAT A SILLY TEA PARTY!

While there are plenty of irritants in the world, there aren’t a lot of ways to alleviate that sense of annoyance. Palca points out that they’re part of human life and they’re something that everyone has to deal with from time to time.

But there are some techniques that people can use — distracting yourself if you’re stuck in a long line or something Palca calls “cognitive restructuring.”

“You can tell yourself that that mosquito is just a part of the life flow of the world and I shouldn’t be mad,” he says. “It’s just trying to do what it was genetically programmed to do.”

Basically, though, the bottom line is that you’re stuck, it’s annoying, and that’s part of life.

From:

Apocalypse 2012 ~ What if the Mayans had it right?

Some say that the Mayan calendar concludes that the world will end on Dec. 21, 2012. That an apocalypse will befall the planet before the year is out.

“Imagination is more important than knowledge.”
Albert Einstein Famous Quote

“Human beings are not an endangered species; however, this isn’t for a lack of trying.” —DNA

“It’s not the pace of life that concerns me. It’s the sudden stop at the end.”

“All the world’s a stage.  And all the men and women merely players: They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts, His acts being seven ages.”
Famous quote by William Shakespeare (April 1564 – April 1616)

The first five seals mentioned in the book of Revelation don’t have to do with the last days, but the sixth does, as mentioned in Rev. 6:12-17:

And I beheld when he had opened the sixth seal, and, lo, there was a great earthquake; and the sun became black as sackcloth of hair, and the moon became as blood;

And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth, even as a fig tree casteth her untimely figs, when she is shaken of a mighty wind.

And the heaven departed as a scroll when it is rolled together; and every mountain and island were moved out of their places.

And the kings of the earth, and the great men, and the rich men, and the chief captains, and the mighty men, and every bondman, and every free man, hid themselves in the dens and in the rocks of the mountains; …

What if you were one of the survivors? And you could only keep three things with you from your present life.

What would you hope that you were able to keep?

Any suggestions???

books, food, NEW ipad 4G LTE!  available on March 16th.