John on September 3rd, 2010

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John on September 3rd, 2010

The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.
~ Helen Hayes (at 73)~

John on September 3rd, 2010

Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out.   But I can usually shut her up with cookies.

~ Unknown~

Sounds like something Maxine would say!

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John on September 2nd, 2010

Inside every older person is a younger person — wondering what the hell happened.
~ Cora Harvey Armstrong ~

John on September 2nd, 2010

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John on September 2nd, 2010

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John on September 2nd, 2010

John on September 2nd, 2010

John on September 2nd, 2010

An Irishman found a Genie lamp and rubbed it. Out came the Genie who says, “Master you have released me from the lamp and I grant you three wishes, what would you like?”

The Irishman scratches his head, then answers, “A bottle of Guinness that never gets empty.”

“Granted, master!”, retorted the Genie and produced the bottle.

The man was delighted and got drunk on this one magic Guiness bottle for weeks then he remembered that he had two other wishes. He rubbed the lamp again and the Genie appeared.

“Yes master, you have two more wishes, what would you like?”

“You know that magic, never ending Guinness bottle?” he asked the Genie. “Well, for my final two wishes, I’d like another two of them.”

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John on September 2nd, 2010

Walking into the bar, Shamus said to O’Heir the bartender, ‘Pour me a stiff one – just had another fight with the little woman.’

‘O, bejabbers,’ said O’Heir, ‘And how did this one end?’

‘Hah, when it was over,’ Shamus replied, ‘she came to me on her hands and knees.’

‘Really?’ cried O’Heir, ‘now that’s a switch!  What did she say?’

She said, ‘Come out from under the bed, Shamus, you little chicken.’


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